For many years I've had a dream, a goal: that Peace on Earth shall come about within my lifetime. Now (2006) I'm 60 years old and it's time to do something about it!
Peacemaking is something you and I can practice and get better at. It would be OK to take many years to grow oneself as a peacemaker -- a fine project for the rest of one's life, something like growing one's horsemanship. (My other website is about horses, www.barefoothorse.com)
Here I want to offer two simple ideas or practices that I find most promising, chosen from many possibilities after a wide search over the years. I see them as an effective way to
build the foundation for peace.
Some of my friends and I have listened to each other's life story for many years. We've noticed that a person who recovers from the scary things that have happened to her, becomes more effective in standing up: for herself, and for those she cares about, and for what is important to her.
She can stand up, cheerfully and confidently, and say, "There's a better way and we are going to use it!"
Fear has kept us silent. And. . . fear can be healed.
Every human being is, or can be, a peacemaker. I want to bring this to our attention. I want us to recognize that (among other things) this is who and what we are. I want us to get more competent as peacemakers -- we need lots of us!
Two Basic Tools for Peace
1) Peace can be approached through widespread healing -- in particular, the healing of fear.
2) Peace can be approached through making ordinary friendships -- in particular, friendships that reach across the barriers of prejudice
and other social divisions (age, gender, "race," ethnic background, class, religion,
nationality, etc.).
At bottom, the way a scared human
being becomes unafraid is by 1) laughing, and 2) shaking or shivering -- that fine trembling of excitement that you get sometimes when you do something courageous.
Laughing and shivering are two ways that humans can dependably heal fear. We can laugh and shiver after a big scare to get our courage back. Next time you find yourself shivering after a scare, don't squelch it with a stiff drink, a cigarette, or a tranquilizer. Be delighted, let the shivering run its course, and then notice how you are different in the next few days.
The experience of my listening-friends shows that an unafraid, confident human being can handle scary situations well -- including standing up to the threats used by the "big guys" to keep us from upsetting their power.
An unafraid human being cannot be pushed around with fear. An unafraid human being is able invent a good solution to handle the situation.
How do you use laughter and shivering, deliberately, to get rid of fear?
Arrange some time with someone who likes and cares about you, who will agree not to "put you down" for being scared, and who agrees to listen while you do some healing. (Your friend will be a better listener for you if you also listen to her or him, for about an equal amount of time.)
You want to be in a situation that is different enough from whatever scared you, so that you can notice you are safe right now. (For example, right now you are not in that canoe, about to plunge over the waterfall -- you're on solid ground in your house. Brrr!) Then you just tell the scary story while you notice your present safety.
Laughter or shivering will happen automatically, each time you notice you are safe -- it's not something you have to force. The longer you can keep laughter or shivering going (by telling the story many times while noticing your present safety) the more you will become unafraid. If you get "lost" in the fear, so that your laughter or shivering stops, it's OK for your listening friend to gently and good-humoredly bring your attention back to the fact you are SAFE NOW.
Any large group of people -- the citizens of a city, a country, the citizens of the world -- could easily get together to stop war and do things differently. So the "big guys" -- and the societies that we live in and the "big guys" profit from -- do everything they can to divide us from one another. ("Divide and conquer...") There are so many people we're not "supposed to" get to know!
-- What is sexism but an ingenious way to divide every household from within -- the womenfolks and the menfolks believing, much of the time, that we can never really understand and trust each other?
-- What is classism but a way to make sure people in "better" classes don't get to hear, respect, and use the sensible ideas of people "below" them -- and to make sure the "lower" people believe they have no useful ideas?
-- to deepen our connection and trust with the people we already know.
No more humans harming humans
(especially not for profit.) That humans will never again feel that the only way to get what they need is to harm somebody else.
No more wrecking the Earth
(especially not for profit). That humanity can and will find marvelously
respectful ways to live as an equal partner among all the other creatures,
the plant world, the interlocking life systems, and the air we breathe.
No more wasting of human gifts and genius.
Each day, after being able to earn at least basic sustenance, everyone on
Earth will have time and energy left over to think about, contribute
to, and celebrate the wonderfulness of life.
Peace is us getting to work together to have things be the way we want them.
Peace is all of us getting to enjoy our own and each other's unique genius and gifts.
Making peace through friendship
-- What is racism but a really great way to keep individual "whites" and "people of color" from knowing each other, caring about each other, and joining together for a society of respect for all?
The divisive society cannot afford for you and me to compare notes on what it does to our lives. So, a basic, effective way to move toward peace is
-- to make friends with people who are different from us, and
A person who knows she is deeply cared about and supported by a "family" of friends and allies of many varieties, cannot be intimidated.
What does "Peace on Earth" mean
to me?
"People love people because,
though the whole Universe is all delightful and appreciable and beautiful,
there is probably nothing else sufficiently complex to really interest
a human mind except another human mind." -- Harvey Jackins
I ran across the Beercan Principle when I used to go hiking in the majestic Cascade Range near Seattle. Nowadays we might call it the Springwater Bottle Principle but in those days it was about beercans. It went like this:
Each beercan, by itself, is a tiny event. But over, say, 50 years, you could in this small way add 18,000 beercans to the general litter around us, or you could pick up 18,000 beercans, making 18,000 spots a little more beautiful to be in.
That's a lot of beercans, one way or the other.
With a little ingenuity we can extend the Beercan Principle to other interesting activities. There would be the possibility of twinkling your eyes at someone, whether they "deserved" it or not, rather than frowning at them.
There would be treating someone as an honored and equal fellow being, instead of putting them down.
People in our society are not used to being twinkled at or having their ideas paid attention to. It does catch their notice! In my experience, most folks will sooner or later start doing the same towards other people, and so your "tiny" influence can spread around you like ripples in a pond.
If we do small actions consistently over many years, the possibilities become quite marvelous. I hope you are getting the notion there is probably some part of your life where you are already "picking up beercans." (wink)
In our tiniest decisions, we can go along with the program of the "divisive society." We can do gazillions of tiny actions that uphold the mindset of the divisive, competitive, war system we live in. Or -- one "beercan" at a time -- we can put together a society that's about thinking and working together, and respect for all beings, including the human ones.
You might spend a few minutes, sometimes, listening to someone so they could heal an old fear. Across 50 years, you would end up with quite a collection of not-so-scared people around you -- and what might a bunch of confident folks be able to do together?
Likewise, suppose once a year you met somebody who was different from you, and you liked them, and said so. (Ohmygosh, tell somebody I like them??) Over 50 years you'd end up with friends of many sorts, and there's a chance you would get some of them liking each other, too, along the way -- and what might you be able to do together?
marjorie@barefoothorse.com
"There are two possibilities along life's trail. You can drop one beercan somewhere every day. Or you can pick up one beercan every day and take it home to the recycle bin".
I would appreciate hearing what you like about what I'm saying.